Is your girlfriend pregnant and you don’t know what to do? Perhaps you are wondering if she is even carrying your baby. Maybe friends and family are encouraging you to push her to have an abortion. Whatever your situation, you are not alone. Lots of couples experience a “surprise” pregnancy and immediately worry about how this will affect their future. Abortion seems like an easy and legal choice but it does have significant risks that you may not understand. Having a baby doesn’t mean the end of your dreams.
It’s hard to realize that women can choose abortion without the permission of the baby’s father. Many women who have had abortions report that they were waiting for their boyfriends/husbands to stop them. Some even say that they sat on the abortion table hoping the father of their baby would “rush through the door to rescue me and take me away somewhere safe.” She needs your friendship and love now more than ever. It’s impossible to determine if you are the father of the baby until after the birth of the baby. If you’ve been with her sexually, assume that you are probably the father of her baby.
The world says that abortion is “a woman’s choice” but the woman in a crisis pregnancy rarely wants to make that choice alone. She is looking to you for support because she can’t confide in many people about this crisis situation. When women hear men say, “Don’t look at me to tell you what to do,” they automatically believe the man wants the abortion. Be careful that you don’t say something that you could regret. Assure her that you will stand beside her in whatever way she needs through this crisis. Inform her immediately that she doesn’t need to have an abortion to please you. Tell her you want to help her in making any choices that will affect your future.